Wow how the time has flown since my Big Chop (BC)! This isn’t my first time down this road, but it is the first time that I decided to make a conscious effort to be a good role model now that I have 2 daughters.
Over the years, my oldest daughter always wanted to wear her hair straight just like mommy. I would give in and let her get it flat ironed so she could let it swing in the wind. Then a few years ago, I made the mistake of letting her get a “kiddie perm”. I know this was bad, but I figured this would make her hair easier to manage and it wouldn’t be such a hassle for our daily hair routine. Boy was I wrong. During the Summer she got her hair relaxed, she wanted to wear it in one ponytail most days. This caused a lot of damage around her hairline and also around her “kitchen” (lol). It got so bad at one point that I asked her if she cut her hair to try and get bangs. O_o
So that brings us to where we are today. I knew that I couldn’t very well tell my daughter that she needed to enjoy her curls if I kept on running to get mine relaxed and wear it bone straight. So last Fall I got some kinky twist and wore them for 3 months then went and got mine chopped. I ended up getting another mini BC this past February and haven’t even thought about getting it relaxed. Today everyone in the house is 100% natural and our hair is thriving. I took my oldest daughter for her BC this past spring break while we were on vacation in Orlando. I had been trying to build her up for the big day and told her she could get a bit of pink in the front so she would still feel girly. Her relaxed ends were limp, dry and damaged and the next step to getting her hair healthy was to cut that mess off. She loves her hair so much more now, but still has those days where she wishes it was longer and the same texture as her little sister. But I told her as long as she takes care of herself from the inside out her hair will thrive and be long in no time.
Oldest Daughter after her BC! |
I understand a BC isn’t for everyone but I have the patience of a gnat and my hair was pretty short to begin with so it wasn’t quite that traumatic for me. Are you thinking of going relaxer-free and have questions? There is a wealth of info and support out there and most likely someone you know is natural. Feel free to share your comments below and contact me if you have any questions.
Remember that life is too short to sweat the small stuff so get a glass of wine and do a big chop! Just kidding…sort of.
*smooches* Alisha
Naturally Nae says
Awesome Post!! You're setting such a great example for your little girls. believe me, I understand. My mom put a kiddie perm on my hair when I was very youung and continued to do so into my high school years. When i left for college, all I knew was a relaxer so I continued to get them. It wasn't until a few years ago that my hair started to rebel. literally! it became lifeless, dull and brittle. After fighting to get my hair back into some form of healthy, I was fed up! After work on a Friday night, I went to the barber and said cut it all off! I've never looked and haven't even thought of getting a relaxer. Great Job!!!
Alisha LAMPLEY says
Thanks you so much for stopping by Jana'e!!! My mom was great with my hair, but I wanted it silky straight hair and *gasp* even got a curl. Lawd that was a hot mess and lasted no time. LOL So glad we have so much info now on taking care of our hair.